Wednesday, June 20, 2012

So...I Took A Drive Tonight...

I went for a drive tonight. I had to get out...leave...and for a moment just feel like I could runaway from all the mess of my life & never come back.
So I chased the sun.
I love the sky in its brilliant colors as the sun sets and hides behind clouds. The rays of the sun beaming out from the clouds as if to say I can still be seen, and I am radiant.

The roads I took led me to the middle of nowhere and it was beautiful.

Small country roads with the most beautiful wildflowers going wild.
I just kept thinking to myself...
This is absolutely beautiful. No one is around, no one knows this beauty...how can no one know about this, cause surely if people knew its beauty they would be here.
I kept driving. Chasing the sun. Not caring where I would end up, I just didn't want it to end. I'll go however long, however far it takes to see the sun go down.
There is something about tonight that was so good for my soul.
A beautiful, perfect combination of goodness.
The perfection was refreshing after having a month of things just going wrong. After a day of hard stuff. The beautiful, perfect combination of goodness was just what I needed.
Windows down, beautiful sky, the smell of wood burning, green fields, colorful wildflowers, wind blowing through my hair, perfect playlist ...
God and I spent a lot of time together on this drive. Not even kidding...5 hours. I spent 5 hours in the car tonight.
I cried, I prayed, I worshiped, I was silent...and this song came on:
Slow me down, O Lord, slow me down
Help my heart to hear Your sound
Speak into my life, Lord, speak now
Slow me down, O Lord, slow me down 
Clear my mind, O Lord, clear my mind
Bring me peace that I cannot find
Take my worried thoughts break my pride
Clear my mind, O Lord, clear my mind 
Wake my soul, O Lord, wake my soul
With this mess I've made make me whole
Of this life called mine, take control
Wake my soul, O Lord, wake my soul 
Slow me down, O Lord, slow me down
Help my heart to hear Your sound
Speak into my life, Lord, speak now
Slow me down, O Lord, Slow me down
A beautiful, perfect combination of goodness.

Then, as I was driving...I came across this:




They were just hanging out in the road. At one point they were all in the middle of the road and I just had to sit there and wait awhile cause they weren't moving. They just looked at me.
It was awesome.
Then I heard the song singing, "Slow me down, O Lord, slow me down."
I laughed again. 
God definitely has a sense of humor.

I found myself begging God, cause that is all I felt like I could do, as His child. Begging Him to just change my heart, to change my life, as I come back home to the reality of a lot of mess.  I want to live this mess as a witness, as a person who has hope.  Who trusts and believes that God is bigger, better, enough and in complete control and completely good.
A Beautiful, Perfect Combination of Goodness.

1 comment:

  1. Great photos - I've always loved a long drive to nowhere. It soothes the soul a bit. Keep praying and keeping the faith during this time, better days will come.

    ReplyDelete